As you would have observed by now, I am a writer. And there is no better place for a writer to be than with and by themselves. Naturally, the best sounds for a writer is the sound of silence, at least when they are writing or trying to fit their thoughts into place. So, I consider myself in the best place when I am home alone, after packing off the husband and the son into the rest of the world. This, is my situation, and it works well for me.
So, what are the things that have gotten you into the situation?
My health for one. I get tired very quickly. I am finicky about going to crowded, closed spaces like malls and detest shopping. I am also a mess when it comes to making conversations that are not emotional in nature. And I keep my friend circles small and extremely close to me.
My thought pattern comes up next. I am thinker, not a doer. At least, as far as hard labor like cooking, cleaning, and organizing are concerned. Research is my favorite thing to do. I, am my favorite person, and inside my head, is my favorite place to be.
What are considered dis-advantages to the rest of the world only work towards aiding what I want to do. See my situation here. It works well for me.
That’s just you…
My best friend hates being at home, has never liked to be at home in all the years that I have known her through her childhood. Even during the weekends, she drags the family away from the house. She is always among a gang of very noisy people, her aim in life is to haunt the malls and look for discounts, and she loves to be the center piece among large groups of larger people. She is usually in the pink of health and keeps herself as healthy as possible. She cannot shut her mouth and not surprisingly, works as a life coach and public speaker. Her job is to reach out to other people and so she is always in situations where she is among people, reading their situations and solving their problems. That is her situation, and it works well for her.
That is just you and your friend…
We live in a place that has a lot of kids, but my son does not get along well with most of them, because they are mean to him. So how is my son in his best situation? Despite the call to fall into line, my son does not. He holds his ground and raises to his challenge, without succumbing to all the teasing and peer pressure.
On the other hand, my friend’s son is rather friendless at home. Since he is a very friendly child, we would automatically assume that he is not in the best situation. But this very friendly child is also a very playful child who gets lost in the art of free play. The more he is among other children, the less he is with himself, which is also very important for self-growth. That is how this child, by remaining friendless in his apartment, is in the best of his situation.
Besides, our situations are the way nature has willed us to grow.
Have you noticed how nature grows? The date palm grows best in the desert oasis, while the coconut tree grows best in coastal areas. While one tree can take the absence of moisture, the other cannot. Ducks don’t build nests on trees, and crows don’t build their homes around waterholes. Nature is always placed in situations that are favorable for it.
While we tend to forget the fact that we are a part of nature too, it is hard to escape its tight slap sometimes. We too grow best in situations that are favorable for us. In fact, we are always put in situations that are favorable for us. Right from the place we are born in, to the local food that we eat, everything about us is set in a favorable situation for us to grow well.
It is we who mess up our situations by trying to break out of nature’s mold – craving food that is not our own, and wanting things that we don’t need. We just don’t see or read our situations well enough to let go of our dissatisfactions that arise from what we see from the world around us.
What is your dissatisfaction?
My greatest dissatisfaction is the fact that I am home-bound. Yes, yes. I just said that my situation works well for me. But I did not say that I liked my situation. Now, why wouldn’t I like a situation that works well for me?! It is simply because when I look at the others and go, “Hey, I see you happy. So, I want what you have.”
Then, I begin to fall into a cycle of wants and dissatisfaction arising from the non-satisfaction of those wants.
Does this mean that you should not see the world outside?
This means that while I see the world outside, I should also acknowledge that no connection with the world outside will ever match the connection that I have established with the world within – that my nature, has placed me in the best of situations that I should seek to make the best out of.
But what of people born into poverty? How are they in the best of situations?!
They are in the best situation to get out of. The greatest players in this game called life are the people who are able to handle the challenges that life throws at them, not the ones who are in search of a smooth life to live out peacefully. For it is the end of life that deserves its peaceful moments, the rest of it, is a roller-coaster ride that has a few peaceful moments thrown in between.
All right! Tell me then how am I in the best of situations?
Understand where you are in terms of your health, thoughts, emotions, work and personal space. Figure out where you want to be in these places. And try to work out whether where you are is also where you want to be. Also, remember that where you want to be might not be the best place for you. It might just be a temptation of the mind to distract you from your best situation.
Next, is where you are, giving you, your best opportunities? If that is the case, then understand that every situation will have both advantages and disadvantages in place. Putting up with the disadvantages in your situation is your challenge. So is shaking off the temptations of the world.
Do you want to get out of your current situation and fall into another situation? Then figure out where your current situation will lead you into. If it is a better place physically, mentally and emotionally, then settle into the peace that you are in your best of situations.
Here’s to understanding and getting into the best of situations!